One night in my college chaplaincy after one of our prayer meetings, I was sitting with two members of the Catholic society. We found ourselves talking about a vast domain of topics ranging from philosophy to the everyday struggles of a university student. At one point in the conversation, I found myself quoting a line from the Catechism of the Catholic Church:

“The virtuous man is he who freely practices the good” -CCC 1804

At this point, I found that by reciting this quote, I had inadvertently incited interest in the two society members sitting before me! Perhaps that was what inspired me to write this article. No, actually, I’m pretty sure it is actually the cornerstone of this article!

What does this line really mean? I have to say that, for a while, I struggled to understand it, and how it applies to my own life. However, with time the clouds of this topic have parted, shining rays of light on what virtue can mean for not only my life, but the lives of all those with whom I am involved. In a world where we are inundated with sources instant gratification; Coffee, Netflix, shopping, (the list goes on), we may quickly find that our free will is being somewhat swamped by a disordered attachment to earthly desires. As I tap my card to pay for a caffeinated drink in a Dublin cafe, or find myself absentmindedly tapping into Netflix, sometimes I have to ask myself; Do I really need this? And friends, this is a powerful question.

In a culture of “I want, therefore I get”, we may find ourselves becoming closer to tyranny and captivity than peace and freedom. That is why sometimes, just sometimes (when I have the moral courage inside me!) I find that I can surrender these desires to God. Why? Because I long to align my will to God’s will above all things. I want to trust that His grace is sufficient, and that He in and of Himself is everything I need to live a fulfilled life. Failure to do this is what the sin of our first parents, Adam and Eve, was based on. Lack of trust in God’s goodness. Submission and surrender to something more pleasing to the eye and instantly gratifying than God appeared to be.

I am not saying that these the earthly things we enjoy are bad, it is only the improper use of them that leads us to sin. In fact, a lot of the time, after disordered use of things, we are left feeling more empty and vacant than when we first began. God doesn’t want this. He wants what’s best for us. He does this by laying down prudent tenets for our participation in His divine nature; the virtues.

Think of traffic lights. They are not placed there because city councils are petty tyrants. Rather they are placed there to preserve the lives of their citizens. Same story with a cancer cell. By evading the normal control mechanisms of the cell, it can “do what it wants on its terms”, but this inevitably leads to death.

Some people ask me: “But shouldn’t you be free to do what you want on your terms?” But, friends, this is not true freedom. Because, without even realizing it, we become enslaved to our emotions and sensitive appetites. Choosing the good (which is ultimately God) above all things is what paves the path to freedom and peace. It is what gives us the capacity to practice self-mastery, and renders us able to say “I, strengthened by God, am more powerful over my addictions than they are over me”

Maybe this comes off as hype, or overly idealistic, but I firmly believe that if you pray in hope to God for the grace to grow in virtue, He will gladly lend it to you.

All glory be to God.

Thank you for your time!

To my beautiful friends!

I just felt somewhat called to write about the notion of grief and how I feel like I can best navigate it, and hopefully inspire you to do the same in your life ❤️🙏🏻

The truth is, grief isn’t a “one-size-fits-all” kind of process. Everybody is going to respond and react differently when it comes to grieving. It doesn’t follow any neat, linear pattern, or correlate with any defined set of factors or variables. No, grief is not simple. Dealing with it is a diverse, multifaceted, nuanced process; the responses to which we can neither accurately predict nor measure. In many ways, we must learn to “surf” the waves it comes in.

While I have faced a bereavement in my family in times of late (as many of you know), I don’t think grief is necessarily confined to death itself. I think it can be the loss of anything or anyone that you once loved, or at the very least invested emotion into. With COVID-19, I lost my college life, my plans to do volunteer work, make a difference in a number of communities around the world, and in some ways, I might have even lost my self esteem too.

But let us consider an analogy that a very wise friend once told me; that life and grief are like bubbles of sorts. The truth is, that, at first, the grief bubble appears to nearly entirely occupy the entire volume of your life bubble. This may become so intense that you can no longer focus on anything else in your life. Other than the grief, there appears to be nothing. But, as life goes on, maybe it’s not that the bubble of grief gets smaller, maybe it’s that the bubble of life triumphs over it, expanding around it at a prodigious rate And, eventually, you can reach an acceptance of this new lifestyle, realizing that your life will go on to have meaning, value and beauty again, albeit in different ways to before.

Acceptance does not mean that you are necessarily on fire with ecstatic energy or elation, it just means that you’ve come to a place where you can accept this new reality and what it means in your life going forward. In time you realize that to hand over your full, beautiful blessing of a life to grief, would ultimately be the greater tragedy.

Also, what I find helps with grief, is finding an outlet to express your humanity. Dr Edith Eger, clinical psychologist and Auschwitz survivor, reinforces this idea with her quote “The opposite of depression is expression.” So if at all possible, find some kind of platform to express your humanity. It works wonders at a time of painful loss or tragedy.

On one final note, maybe we should not try to change the way the world or our circumstances look; maybe we need to try to change the way we see them.

Rooting for you with all my heart ❤️

-Ellen

If I had a nickel for every time someone told me that “college is a huge change from school”, I could retire comfortably. Picture the scene. A first year university student walks into a crowded lecture hall. They are no longer well esteemed and recognized amongst their fellow students as they were in their close-knit secondary school. They have never used online learning facilities. Their lecturer doesn’t know their name. It all seems a bit too much, right?

The simple answer is no. No, it is not too much. At least not for someone who is willing to put their mind to it. Some of the biggest challenges incoming first years face will be surmountable by one means or another. And here’s a few ideas as to how:

1.Don’t be a stranger: Some of the major challenges students experience in college have to do with loneliness and isolation. It feels as though you’re a small fish in a big pond, a perfect stranger to the rest of the campus. Remember that you don’t have to go through it alone and that there is a good chance that everyone else around you feels the same. So talk about it with someone.

2. Join clubs and societies: I cannot stress the importance of this vital second step! In such a large, sometimes daunting environment, it is vital that you have an outlet. This will help to give you a sense of belonging in what can sometimes feel like a very impersonal setting. The great thing about most universities nowadays is that they have something to cater for everyone’s interests. From knitting to kayaking, from debating to dancing, the world is really your oyster when it comes to college clubs and societies!

3. Don’t get every recommended textbook: This happens quite a lot to first years when they haven’t had the experience of studying at third level yet. Professors may very well recommend what they deem useful books, but this does not mean that they are mandatory books. You can easily fish up a lot of useful information from the internet, published articles or journals, or even rent out college library books for a short period. You don’t have to break the bank to do well in college!

4. Keep on top of the workload: This can be a struggle for some, especially if you were the kind of student who depended heavily on your teacher to hold you accountable in school. The good news is that many of your assignments will count towards your final grade, so that will be plenty of motivation in and of itself. Maybe even organize little study groups of 3-4 diligent students who you know will use the session time productively. Flashcards and highlighters work wonders here!

5. Be original! It’s important to realize that college is not school! Professors don’t want you to utilize leaving cert tactics by memorizing facts and phrases word for word. College is all about taking the information that’s given to you and applying it in an original way that is open to interpretation and further research by academic critics. Sometimes it’s useful to propose a hypothesis at the beginning of an essay, test it throughout the course of your work, and prove or disprove it at the end. Again, the internet is very useful in finding all sorts of weird and wonderful facts in your chosen field of study!

6. Ask for help: From my personal experience of university, each faculty has an authoritative body you can go to if you are concerned about anything from changing your modules to glitches in your timetable. Utilize these people! I’m pretty sure there’s no concern you could raise to them that they haven’t heard a thousand times before!

7. Talk about your lectures: Research (and a bit of common sense) will tell you that talking to friends or colleagues about a topic will help you to understand and engage with it better. It might be useful to set aside some time to meet up with some reliable classmates and exchange ideas and opinions on the lecture material. This way you are opening the floor to broader perspective and more effective communication.

8. Take study breaks: It is easy to get bogged down by the intensity of assignments and study material. Something simple like going to a coffee shop with friends or taking a short walk around campus can make all the difference to your mind as well as your body. Take breaks, even when you feel like you shouldn’t. We are humans, not robots. We thrive off of a sense of temporality and routine. Time for leisure is vital to the proper functioning of our minds inside and outside of the classroom.

9. Trust Yourself: This doesn’t just go for your study routine, this goes for every aspect of your college life. College can be an uncertain and challenging enough time as it is without your own mind playing up on you. You may be stepping into new territory, but the fundamental sense of who you are has not changed. After all, you are smart and brave enough to have made it to university in the first place. Believe in yourself.

10. Don’t give up: Last, but by no means least on the list. Don’t surrender! You are stronger than you know. It may take a while to get into a rhythm, but eventually we adapt to new conditions. (Anyone studying science will remember that from Evolutionary biology)😉 Everything worth anything takes time, patience and perseverance. You’ve got this!

The world is seeking stability. We see it all around us. The sciences in particular have a colorful variety of examples; Natural Selection, Homeostasis, Chemical Equilibrium, to name but a few. What is this constant drive towards steadiness, stability?

The truth is, we are restless. Our minds are inundated with noise, with Instagram photos and stories, -those which we click into almost aimlessly- with the ideas of what life ‘should be’ like.

These things cause turmoil and anxiety to accumulate inside of us. I have to admit, I’m no better at times. The moment that the COVID-19 lockdown was announced, I felt sick to my stomach. It was as though the rug of security, meaning and belonging was pulled from under me and I ended up flat out on my rear end. I was forced to face the things that my high-flying life in Dublin made so easy to escape from. I became plagued with questions “What will I do every day?”, “How will I adjust to this?”, and probably the most frightening of them all, “What is the meaning of my life?”

Despite my initial unease, the erosion of mental health and economies, and the inconceivable loss of life around the globe, some part of me is grateful that this happened. It has posed bigger, more meaningful questions that we have all found materialistic and modern ways to avoid. Iy has reminded us of the disposability of this life; how, when all of those materialistic things are taken from you, only two things truly remain: God our Father, and Family.

These two specimens are, in fact, love. And as each of us need food to nourish the body, we just as much need love to nurture the soul. I can say with certainty that the love that has come from my family, and the loving strength that God our Father empowers me with every day, has been more than enough to survive the struggles of any lockdown. This affirms that all those other things that were possible to me before the pandemic, were just bonuses, superfluities. Without them, I can and will survive.

So maybe, friends, in this world of constant change, decay and chaos, the only thing that’s stable is love. Maybe it’s something that you could search the furthest reaches of the universe for, and never find anything more beautiful. At least that’s how it’s been for me. This entire situation has shown me just how fragile and vulnerable to change everything in life is. So, the only resolution I can come to at the end of it all is to stick with the fundamentals, the basics. God, love, the only thing bigger than fear.

Here are some visual manifestations of how He has made my life beautiful during this time of broken offering:

Thank you for your time, friends. I wish you all the very best in this life, and if we’re thinking long-term, then the next as well.

Thanks be to God 🙏🏻

-Ellen

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton